🟢The same image

Sometimes it is difficult to say why this particular person is interesting, why we are attracted to him. After all, there is a lot of unaccountable, unconscious in our choice. In each of us, somewhere deep inside, there are images of people who took part in our growing up.

These are images of parents and other loved ones who have left a mark on our fate. They often mix reality and children's fantasies, but it is these images that we associate with love – the way we understood it and what we received (or did not receive) in childhood. And if the person we met subtly "gets" into this image, awakening dormant memories of the first significant relationships, we can no longer pass by and remain indifferent. We are intrigued, excited and very soon-in love.

🟢 Childhood wounds

If in childhood, in relations with mom and dad, we lacked something very much, we will strive (still unconsciously) to make up for this deficit in an alliance with a loved one. Therefore, we most often choose someone who, as it seems to us, will help heal the wounds of childhood, realize psychological needs, expectations, hopes and dreams and find everything that we were once deprived of-love, protection, recognition, admiration, and maybe even independence, our own significance and perfection.

This is very interesting: we feel in our chosen one a native soul, in many ways similar to us, and at the same time he complements us, "completes" us, because he has qualities that are not strongly developed or not developed at all in ourselves. And we ,in turn, "finish building" him: he is persistent and decisive, and we lack firmness, he is reasonable, and we are more impulsive, he is reserved, and we have a lot of spontaneity, he is tough, and we show flexibility.

🟢 Discovering each other

The relationship of two people is a living organism that develops and sometimes gets sick. He may recover, or he may die prematurely. At the dawn of a relationship, being in a frenzy of feelings, we do not see any flaws in the partner. For us, it is beautiful. In fact, we fall in love with someone we don't know at all. When the veil falls, we see a living person who is not too similar to us, with his weaknesses and shortcomings.

❗️ The secret of a successful, successful union is communication, comfortable and safe interaction (without devaluation, manipulation and hitting), a mutual desire to negotiate, a willingness to talk about the most painful and conflicting, not to hush up problems, the ability to withstand negative feelings (your own and others'), the ability to ask, accept and provide support, as well as to refuse what does not suit you, and respect the right of another to the same.