What illusions should be discarded in order to become happier and a soul mate?


The first illusion.

If we change the legislation in such a way that women's rights can be infringed, then men will live better and families will become stronger.

This also includes the requirement to cancel alimony (then the woman will think a hundred times before breaking up the family), set a separate property regime in marriage by default, and so on. According to the idea of great thinkers, this step will lead to the fact that men will marry more willingly, there will be more marriages, and fewer divorces. However, this assumption comes solely from the premise that a woman needs a family and children very, very much, and a man only graciously agrees to a marriage that is unfavorable for him.

In fact, a sharp restriction of women's rights in the field of family and marriage will lead to the fact that no marriages will be concluded at all. And there will be no children born. The nineties can serve as a model of such a situation, where the concentration of negative conditions for the birth of children, such as poverty, unemployment, lack of social guarantees, was very high. And we did not get a surge in the birth rate, as in some Somalia. Namely, its sharp decline, the consequence of which we are still dealing with.


The second illusion.

If you tell a woman about your rules, then she will understand who is the boss in the house, and she will become like silk.

Many men who have read the ideas of the so-called "male enlightenment" have faced this. This is especially true for young men who do not have any significant experience of real relationships.

Here and there, in different places, I read offended letters from junior comrades to senior educators. It turns out that if you behave like a weirdo with a girl, don't pay attention to her, try to dominate at every step and rudely show what an alpha male you are, the girl will not only not get into it, falling head over heels in love with you, but will leave. Often to a more successful opponent. A girl has a choice, and a pretty adequate girl has a large selection of men who are potentially interested in a relationship with her, and at the same time do not behave like emperors. And an adult woman, even if the choice of gentlemen is smaller, but there is less need for them, since the reproductive program has already been completed.

As a result, even the most astute fighters for the idea found that in modern conditions, it will not be possible to keep a woman on the "natural" need for a man alone, you will have to invest in a relationship, keeping a balance, or remain without a relationship. It seems that something went wrong…


The third illusion.

Dating one woman is expensive, and dating different women is cheap and angry.

The chorus of offended voices is especially loud when discussing some nonsense, trinkets, such as bouquets of flowers in plastic packaging, or paying for a cup of latte in a coffee shop. However, considering such a blatant injustice as a ritual cup of coffee, gradually disappearing into the past, the real arithmetic is forgotten, which says that two salaries are better than one, that it is cheaper to rent/pay for one apartment than two, that not only the average woman, but also the average man, will not pull out children alone, and so on.

The long-term relationship of a man and a woman, from the point of view of economics, looks like this. A short and bright period of courtship with bouquets and sweets, because of which men are worried, and which in our reality lasts no more than two weeks. And then a long-term mutually beneficial cooperation, when a woman will cook, save, and support you with a penny. But short-term relationships are daily spending on cappuccino with unpredictable results.