The point is that a whole bag of demands, mainly our own, and to ourselves, clings to the New Year. The tension has been growing exponentially since the beginning of December, and we are in horror waiting for how soon they will begin to evaluate us, and we will need to present something like this: a happy family, joyful children, an elegant Christmas tree, a close-up of some homemade toy for this Christmas tree on Instagram ... Exquisite table, correct Olivier. A circle of loyal and devoted friends, not autistic neurotics from Facebook. I would like to show - to myself, to myself, first of all - the worthy results of the year: the career has grown, the income, the member has also grown.
But the puzzle doesn't add up.
This was understandable before. But here you still have to meet with relatives and distant acquaintances, with some Vasya, the husband of Lena's Machine, with some uncle Tolya and his wife, with this collective hellish Santa Claus. And all the tactless questions that can be asked by a Russian multiplied by alcohol will be asked.
And the inconsistency of the puzzle will become apparent.
So a corrosive feeling of inferiority, shame and anger creeps in advance. Poisonous. Nauseous. From which, naturally, one wants to escape and close.
New Year is the point of maximum discrepancy, a huge gap between the glossy Christmas card and reality. Because the postcard was actually not invented in order to translate it into reality. She is a thing in herself. This exam cannot be taken because it does not have to be taken.
But many in a single impulse still try to combine with the picture. And by inertia you yourself rush after, and you are terribly exhausted.
Moreover, the further, the more the panic grows and the feeling that there is still nothing to be done. Some special things outside the schedule appear, buy gifts, decorate the office (if you please cut out 30 paper lanterns by tomorrow and glue snowflakes on the windows), make a costume for the child for a matinee, come running to this matinee, sign postcards, send postcards. Everyone is running, flying and jumping.
And the unit of time remains a unit.
It does not turn into the top ten, a miracle does not happen, even though, it would seem, the New Year.
Here we often fall into the "witch's ring": the more things to do, the stronger the tension - the higher it is, the more we get tired - the more tiredness, the less you have time - iiiiii, panic grows, we enter a new circle.
The more we try to feed a thousand cases in one day and cram something unproductive, the more bitter in the end the resentment and disappointment. Santa Claus failed again. The miracle did not happen. It is with our last bit of strength that we have to arrange a miracle for someone else, work overtime, arrange all these Christmas trees-matinees-gifts-corporate parties.
Not everyone, of course, falls into the abyss of despair at this point.
You need special conditions to fall into it.
But there are also very few people in the population experiencing delight and anticipation. There are even fewer of them than those who are fond of quilling, and do you know a lot of people who are fond of quilling?
Google it.
Every day I listen to a whole palette from "no festive mood" to "how the damn New Year got sick, I can't stand it since childhood." I think that only manufacturers of Christmas balls and tinsel are really happy about the New Year. And pleasant chores are generally an oxymoron.
Let's relax.
This is just the night of December 31st to January 1st. Thin and very conditional border between one month and another. Between night and day. There are at least 12 such nights-transitions a year. A miracle will not happen, most likely, but a tragedy will not happen either.
And do not mentally expose yourself to humiliating and shameful assessments on behalf of Santa Claus. In fact, he does not care how we behaved this year, we will still receive a gift. You will see.
It is also useful to remember that all past losses stick to the New Year, a family holiday, all their bitterness - not only loved ones and things that we lost, but also a happy family, which we may have never had, and traditions which did not work out. Try to let go of this lump. It is possible that it weighs a ton.
Save your strength, because in the darkest pit of winter there are few of them. And there won't be many of them, nowhere to take. Our body is not physiologically adapted to dance with all its might in the cold and darkness.
And every day, give yourself at least half an hour to do nothing.
An hour is better.
Nothing.
And don't be fooled, it doesn't make any sense. Nothing means nothing.
Also, since New Year's neurosis is an examination neurosis, you can Google “how to help a child survive the exams” and then follow the instructions. Praise yourself, encourage yourself, avoid overloading. Sleep during the day. Do not overuse. Breathe.
And there it is morning.