Both romantics and realists agree on one thing: no matter how much people love each other, sooner or later the strong emotions pass. Passion, awe and inspiration are replaced by a sense of responsibility, respect and stability. But, unfortunately, this is not enough to maintain harmony in a relationship.

1. Forget the myth of two halves 💕
When we fall in love, we always feel an extraordinary lift. We get excited, we wait with trepidation for the call, we try to make an impression. And we never know for sure how it will all end. It is this - the uniqueness and independence of the other person, the shakiness and instability of the relationship - that fuels our passion.

But then almost all couples make the same mistake: they grow so close that there are no boundaries between them.

There is no longer the mysterious world of the other person, no longer the distance we longed to overcome at first. The upshot is sad: we become bored, and that can ruin any relationship.
The difficulty is that we need to learn how to balance: intimacy and trust must be balanced with the personal freedom and independence of each partner. Try to get out of the joint comfort zone and feel partly alone. Develop as independent full-fledged individuals.

2. Look at the relationship from a different angle👀
If at the beginning of the relationship we admire our partner and discover something new every day, after a while we start thinking as if we know absolutely everything about him/her. Of course, this is a huge misconception, which we willingly accept, because we are afraid of change. At the same time, deep down inside, we keep wishing for unpredictability.
Trying to make the relationship safe and drive a loved one into a given pattern, we ourselves are killing the passion that requires mystery. The solution to this problem can be quite simple: just look at your union with different eyes.

❗️ It's only our illusion that relationships can be stable and predictable. Feel how fragile they really are.❗️

Step away from reality and try to see your partner as a mysterious stranger. Observe him from the sidelines, as if he is a stranger: how he shines at work, does his favorite hobby, communicates with friends. Many people say that it is in these moments again begin to feel attracted.

3. loosen your control 🛂
In striving to become one with the other person, we cause another side effect: our partner begins to feel caged. Many people control their spouse's every move, build a fence between the family and the world around them, trying to completely shield their relationship from possible shocks.

❗️Unusually, this behavior can lead to infidelity.❗️

Your partner is a free individual. He once chose you because he chose to do so himself. But once fidelity ceases to be a voluntary pattern of behavior, the person may have an overwhelming desire to break free from the shackles and commit an act of defiance.
So there is no need to impose your principles on the partner and call for monogamy, to monitor all of his movements and ask compromising questions. These you will only fuel the desire to make up for the lack of personal space and go in search of forbidden pleasures.

4. Acknowledge the shadow of the third👥
There is a third on the periphery of any couple's relationship. It could be a high school crush, the handsome cashier at the store, or the cute school teacher you flirt with when you pick up your son from school. And the stranger who smiled at you on the subway is also the third. Whether real or not, this third person is the materialization of our desire for something beyond the walls we have built.

❗️Additionally, it is the presence of the third person that holds our relationships together. Openly admit that your partner may have fantasies and desires of his own in which you do not participate.❗️

When we affirm each other's independence, we are no longer so drawn to seeking freedom elsewhere. By allowing the existence of a third, we acknowledge that the relationship is changing and evolving.
Now the third is not a shadow, but a real character, we can talk about it, joke about it, play with it. When we are not afraid to tell the truth, we have no need to keep something a secret. This can add color to the relationship, because everyone begins to realize that they do not own their partner completely.

5. Get rid of the cult of children👶🏻
The cult of children is a trend that has developed in our society over the past few decades. It wouldn't have occurred to our great-grandparents to make such a fuss over a child. We, on the other hand, try to do everything we can to make sure that he is absolutely happy every second.
In most modern families, moms and dads try to become ideal parents, to provide the child with every possible benefit, to devote every free minute to him. Of course, there isn't much time or energy left for a partner.

❗️ But can you really hope that the passion and romance will not leave the relationship? ❗️

Stop this madness. Stop spending all of your time on the baby: to maintain interest in each other, spouses must show care and attention to more than just the children. Figure out where and when you can stay together without worrying about family and domestic problems.
Make a regular escape from the routine: spend a couple of hours in a restaurant or a movie theater, go on a weekend trip to the countryside.