I remember my uncertainty then, at times horrifying, whether I could take SUCH responsibility on myself - responsibility for a person's life.
And, yes, these words, to give a person a good start, were my motto for the first two years after the birth of my son. I recalled volumes of books on parenting, studying methods and approaches, CC to relatives and myself, stiff adherence to the recommendations of psychological literature .... I was very afraid, and even now, to be honest, I'm afraid of being a bad mother.
But here's the paradox. It seems that I did everything right (based on the point of perception of the right that I had then), but my son, growing up, began to show himself not at all the way I expected. All sorts of child-parental problems abound with him. And thanks to him for that. Because he is my main teacher. And it teaches, first of all, that it is impossible to be perfect, it is impossible to do something perfectly, and even more so to raise a child. Yes, and you don't need it.

Now I have come to understand that in this matter it is necessary to lose in advance, to surrender. To understand from the very beginning that I will not be an ideal, correct mother. Never. My child doesn’t care when he grows up he will find a bunch of his problems that he had because his mother didn’t do it, but didn’t finish it.
I will still make mistakes, even trying to do the best. It is important to understand this, accept and calm down. And just be a mother. And to find advantages for the child in the fact that his mother is a mere mortal. Sometimes tired, irritable, lazy, something else (everyone has their own). At a minimum, an inevitable plus is that a child, when he grows up, will allow himself to be just a person, and not "the super-ideal of my mother's / father's dreams"). D. Winnicott has such a concept as "a good enough mother." This is a mother who responds correctly and in time to her child. That is, he feeds, waters, comforts him when the child needs it. In other words, it is included in the child. And this is the main thing, this is the main thing - to notice and satisfy his main needs: food, protection, communication, love.
And let it be imperfect, not according to the books. Let each mother grope for her intuitive approach to her child. Making mistakes, doubting, trying again and again to build that world and those relationships that she and her child need. Keeping in mind that she won't be perfect anyway.
Books, advice, including from psychologists, provide knowledge, help expand the range of ways and methods that you can use, change or form an angle of view on something. But this is not the key to success as a parent.
Intuition, the ability to feel what the child needs now, what his behavior is about, to give a reaction in time, right. This is instinct. Hear the child, hear yourself and do what needs to be done. Now my answer on how to be a good mother is this.
It's better not to worry about it at all. I am deeply convinced that for every child his mother is the best, no matter what she is.