Envy
Does the husband have a more interesting job, and does the wife have a new car? In a healthy relationship, this is a reason to be happy for a loved one, and not to envy. The ability to be proud of the partner's achievements, and not try to surpass them, is a sign of a harmonious union.

Superiority and competition
Leave the battle a place in the sun outside of your family. In a healthy relationship, there is no competition or superiority. If, nevertheless, you are faced with a similar problem, direct your energy to self-development - so you can not only learn new things and grow intellectually, but also find something to distract you from negative thoughts.

Rudeness and insults
Insulting a partner is the highest degree of disrespect for his personality. This is an escalation of the conflict, such a turn of it, after which there is no way to rewind. So think twice before crossing this line.

Humiliation
Does your partner constantly emphasize your shortcomings and weaknesses? He always lacks something, and you are to blame for this? Does he arrange groundless scenes of jealousy? He demands that you live up to his expectations, be obedient, but you are still guilty? In a healthy relationship, you definitely won’t see this, since this is a toxic behavior that requires emergency measures. Namely, breakups.

Indifference
Indifference destroys more than quarrels and scandals. As long as the spouses care, as long as there are still feelings and attraction between them, the relationship can be returned. But when one becomes all the same, there is no chance anymore. Indifference can be false when, say, a wife is offended by her husband and “turns off” emotions. She routinely performs her duties, but defiantly does not talk, refuses intimacy until she receives the desired reaction from her husband. This is the next item on our list (manipulation or manipulative indifference). When we are dealing with true indifference, then the spouses or one of them no longer need any reaction. They do not care. They are not even offended, and this is already really scary. Alas, the word from cold pieces of ice cannot be assembled even in a fairy tale.

Authority manipulation
“I want the best (only I know the best), so you have to do this ..”, “you are like a child, you can’t do anything yourself. Let me..". In another way, these phrases sound like this: "be dependent on me, I'm afraid that I will not be needed or not needed." You won't find that in a healthy relationship. This is the prerogative of codependency.

Greed
In a relationship of happy couples, it is pleasant for a partner to spend his time, energy and money on a loved one. If you feel sorry for one of these resources, this is a bad sign.

Lack of sexual interest
In a healthy relationship, partners' sexual interest in each other is always present. Intimate relationships are a litmus test in a couple. Violation of sexual attraction to a partner is an indicator that something is wrong in a relationship. In the most difficult cases, the lack of sexual interest turns into an aversion - an aversion to sexual activity with a particular partner.

Deafness to partner's words
If you really want to tell someone a secret, tell your husband. He still doesn't listen to you. Now seriously. A loved one listens to you, but does not hear? He will not ask about your affairs, and if you talk, then he listens without any interest and participation? In healthy relationships, communication is structured differently.

Deprivation or neglect
Deprivation is the deprivation or limitation of the ability to meet the vital needs of a partner. A variant of deprivation or ignoring is when something gnaws at a person, but the partner does not want to talk about it and does not want to notice that there is such a problem. He prefers to ignore it, leaving a loved one alone with his expectations. Refusal to meet emotional needs (warmth, tenderness) and physical (denial of intimacy), ignoring the needs of a partner are all signs of a toxic relationship.

Silence
In a happy relationship, a person does not have to hide their feelings and emotions. In modern life, perhaps, we all put on certain masks. We do not want to show our fears, anxieties to the environment, we do not want to look vulnerable or upset. But at home, there should be no need to wear a mask. That's why they are close relationships, that we can not be afraid to be weak, talk about our feelings, fears and emotions, knowing that they will not turn away from us. Silence does not solve problems, but exacerbates them. Silence and pretend that there is no problem -it's a ticking time bomb.Inability to ask for help
In a toxic relationship, asking for help is a sign of weakness. In healthy people - an indicator of frankness and trust. Your partner would rather rewrite the project five times than turn to you for help, and you will move the sofa until you break your back, but do not ask for help? Alas, your relationship is far from the norm.

Idealization
A sign of a healthy relationship is an objective look of partners at each other. Both the advantages and disadvantages of each other are obvious. Instead of idealizing or devaluing relationships, cooperation and using the strengths of each for the good of the union is important. Partners accept each other without trying to improve.

Persecution and violation of autonomy
In a happy relationship, both partners maintain autonomy. Each of them can independently make decisions in what area and to what extent he develops, works, realizes himself, whether to play sports. Autonomy also lies in the partner's ability to be alone for some time (the right to privacy). In co-dependent relationships, the right to autonomy of one partner is suppressed by another.

The partner who seeks to merge and strengthen the connection is called "pursuing." The second, who wants to maintain a distance, needs personal space and autonomy, is called "withdrawal" or "distancing".

The persecuting partner feels that he and his efforts to maintain and develop the relationship are not appreciated. He or she is experiencing loneliness and this can lead to an increase in negative emotions such as feelings of rejection, shame about one's desire for intimacy, lower self-esteem, lack of love. In this situation, the most dangerous thing is that the more the pursuer pursues, the more the one who withdraws is removed. There is a vicious circle, a repetition of the conflict with a growing emotional component and a growing feeling that everything is lost. In a healthy relationship, everyone's right to autonomy is natural.

Behavior control
“Remove this photo from Instagram. It's too revealing." In a happy relationship, one partner does not decide for the other how he can behave, but how not; with whom you can communicate, and with whom not; what clothes to wear and so on. Healthy relationships are built on trust, and where there is trust, there is no room for control.

It is important to remember that in the relationship of happy couples there is no inclusion of third parties, depreciation of the partner and comparison with others. The goal of a healthy relationship is to create a strong emotional union based on mutual respect and equality of partners who strive to live happily together, and both work on the quality of the relationship. There are no other targets.