1. A neighbor complained to me about snoring from our apartment: "Tell your husband to stop!" I sleep soundly, and I decided not to pester my husband. Until one day I woke up in the middle of the night and saw that he was sleeping quietly on his side, holding the pillow tightly to his ear ...

2. - I wanted to get married, so I come to the registry office, and there they tell me: "You need to have the groom with you." What am I paying taxes for?

3. The lady tells her friend:
- I painted my eyebrows, eyelashes, lips, fingernails and toenails ... I can’t stop! I went to the yard and painted the fence more.

4. - I'm going to get married. And when will you, Lena, get married?
“And I have a fucking problem. They try, praise, but do not take.

5. Ah, this feeling when you walk down the street, the sun is shining, a cute boy is walking towards you, smiling at you and, having caught up with you, says:
- Take off the booties!