More recently, love at a distance passed more in the category of exotic. The most common reason for such a relationship was the call of a young man to serve in the army, and the analysis of these same relationships came down to the bravura song "In two winters I will serve as it should and return." But times have changed radically. Borders are blurring, the world is getting smaller, and we ourselves are becoming more mobile. And the situation when one of the partners lives in Moscow, and the other in St. Petersburg, London or New York, does not seem out of the ordinary for a long time.

Good work, political preferences, and even a more suitable climate - there are more and more reasons for such love at a distance. Modern means of communication allow partners not only to hear, but also to see each other almost every minute. And high-speed trains and planes make it possible to meet, if not every weekend, then at least once a month. In foreign psychology, a special term has already appeared - long-distance relationships (LDR), and researchers are increasingly studying the features of such relationships.

LOVE AT A DISTANCE: NOT WORSE BUT BETTER?
At the same time, society, apparently in the old fashioned way, still does not believe in the possibility of any long-term love at a distance. And even more so in its usefulness. According to Psychology Today magazine, 56.6% of people find long-distance relationships less happy and healthy than regular ones. However, research data refute this view.

So, a group of American psychologists published an article based on in-depth surveys of 1142 people over 20 years old who are in relationships - both regular and remote. According to the data obtained, there are no fundamental differences in these two models of relations at all.

Participants were asked to rate satisfaction with their relationship on several key dimensions. They included degree of intimacy, emotional involvement, quality of communication, and level of sexual satisfaction. And in none of these parameters, partners living under the same roof or just in the same city could not surpass those who are separated by hundreds of kilometers.

Moreover, people in long-distance relationships were often even more satisfied with them. It sounds paradoxical, but psychologists explain this fact by the fact that love at a distance has a certain degree of idealization. And rare meetings of partners become real holidays, while lovers are spared from the everyday and often not very pleasant routine.

TIPS FOR LONG DISTANCE RUNNERS
However, researchers are still far from unanimity on this issue. And the clinical psychologist Ben Michaelis, for example, sees the main danger of love at a distance in idealization. Such love is indeed like a prolonged honeymoon, he believes. But sooner or later, every honeymoon ends. And people who are accustomed to love each other at a distance come together - and are completely unprepared for the prose of life. To the same routine that couples who live together or next to each other somehow get used to.

Ben Michaelis is generally rather skeptical about distant love, although he cannot completely deny it. What the title of his article says quite eloquently: "Why Distance Relationships Never Work (Except When They Do)." For those who believe in themselves and their partner and want to keep love in spite of distances, the psychologist is ready to give three important pieces of advice.

1. Prioritize and be truly included
Your long-distance relationship should be more important to you than most of the social connections at your fingertips. It can be difficult, just like staying at home and waiting for your loved one to go on Skype when friends and girlfriends invite you to a movie or a club is not easy. But it is necessary for such a relationship. Moreover, short meetings are often not enough to get to know each other really deeply, and one should not neglect any of the opportunities for communication.

2. Don't get locked into each other
Of course, having finally met a loved one, there is a great temptation to lock yourself up with him at home or in a hotel for all the time allotted to you - and let the whole world wait. But this is a mistake. Use the meeting time to introduce your partner to your family and friends - or to get to know his (her) loved ones.

We are largely defined by our circle of friends. And if these circles for partners remain a mystery behind seven seals, then there is no need to talk about serious and reliable relationships.

3. Plan for the future
No matter how far apart you are and no matter how long your distance relationship lasts, it cannot and should not last forever. They should be considered temporary. And plan for the future that will come when you finally don't have to travel hundreds of miles to meet. This gives about relations perspective and stimulus to development.