AS i read though the lives trials and times of the people that write i note in a few of them a definite understanding of the purposes to which people are born , yet many people fail to grasp they have a destiny and fewer show the desire to find that purpose and or destiny and follow it.

for some our purpose is not to marry or have riches or be born beautiful yet is not being a great mother and bringing up a child and keeping him or her safe still a worthy accomplishment, for others its to run business and employ people and be honest and fair in their business dealings or be a lawyer or judge and bring Justice to the people , or being a doctor or nurse healing people saving lives

a lot of the letters i get come from selfish hearts, a lot of women would be planning their divorce the day they married me its often being said "if your a nothing without money your still going to be a nothing with it" and in a lot of cases a worse person because of riches more selfish and full of your own importance and showing less respect for everyone else as though being poorer is inferior to you

im a great believer in the eastern concept of Kama which follows a law in the universe "for every action there is a equal and opposite reaction" so all the good you do in small amounts add up and come back to you many fold likewise the bad selfish things you do well lets say Kama is a bitch on payback day and nobody is immune to the laws of the universe and yes most terrible horrible things will come back on you many times over , as the bible says " you reap what you sow" so i ask you are their weeds growing in your fields of life or wheat ???

many women begin their letters telling me how terrible your local men are , no respect for women their all cheaters and alcoholics , basically children in mens bodies and not living up to the expectations of decent women etc etc etc

yet i ask myself if women are having such high standards and the male side is so bad do the females of your country also have faults , Sadly the answer is many women on this site believe in unrealistic expectations fairy tales told to children and fantasies they ARE seeking a rich charming prince and of course cosmetic surgery for this or that , and spend money on clothes fast cars and vanity, yet not one cent of your money is allocated on improving the space between your ears or getting some maturity in your thinking or improving your personality or skill set etc

so the question comes down to using wisdom in your life choices and find your purpose so when choosing a partner ,be he a local or foreign , settle for a humble man someone you can live with who is better than a fantasy prince (who will not live up to your expectations either) and by following unrealistic expectation you bring ruination upon his life your life and bad Kama into the entire family

from one older not so handsome guy tired of the unrealistic expectations of so many of the women on this site seeking not their purpose or destiny but rather a cosmetic life and only having monetary material thinking.

Graham Christian