Here are the habits that seem normal in our society, but can actually ruin relationships:

1. Expecting your partner to "fix" your emotional upset.
How many times have you fought because your partner wasn't there for you in your time of need or wasn't empathetic enough to your bad day? Have you built up resentment because your loved one didn't show the emotions you "should"? While it is important to support a loved one, there is a big difference between support and emotional commitment. You should complement each other without feeling that one of you depends on the other.
What to do instead: You can simply ask your partner, “I’m having a hard time doing this alone/alone – can you help me get through this?” Keyword: ask. You can voice how you want your partner to perform in this support. Take responsibility for your emotions without expecting others to be responsible for your emotional state.

2. Maintain relationships according to the principle "you give me - I tell you."
Fairness and balance are two great qualities, but sometimes they are very similar to keeping score in a relationship. If you find yourself mentally calculating the effort your partner is putting in and how it compares to the effort you are putting in; or if one of you responds to an insult with arguments from the past, it means that one of you or both of you are more focused on scoring points than on maintaining a happy relationship. Relationships should not include a system of "you to me - I to you", which takes into account who screwed up more or who owes whom more.
What to do instead: Relationships don't have to be "fair and honest" to be good. If you live together, you don't have to share household chores equally (for example, "I cooked, so you should do the dishes" or "I walked the dog yesterday, so you should do it today"). Instead, invite your partner to do exactly what he likes best. And take for yourself what your partner really can't stand. And vice versa. Think about what makes sense to each of you, not about what is "fair" and what is not. And treat each issue or disagreement as if it were completely new, without bringing up questions from the past, without remembering past grievances, and without comparing with what it once was.

3. Consider that your partner is your "other half."

The biggest mistake and stupidity is to think that a person should “complete” you. No one can live a fulfilling life with the belief that he needs another person to be completely happy or to solve all his problems. This attitude can lead to toxic dynamics such as codependency, insecurity, and controlling behavior.
What to do instead: See your partner as a person who enriches and completes your already fulfilling, happy life. Focus more on yourself than relationships, look for what makes you happy so you can share your joy and accomplishments with your loved one.