Cheating is a choice, it does not always indicate a bad relationship.
It is worth talking about betrayal as a choice - it gives the feeling that one person is responsible for betrayal, and the other person does not feel guilty for it. Because even in happy families there are difficulties. And it is a person's choice to deal with these difficulties by looking for a connection "on the side".

In society, there is an opinion that betrayal is a consequence of some kind of deficient relationship model. Something is going wrong in the relationship, I am not adding something to the person, and that is why the person is cheating on me.

The person who committed the betrayal made two choices:
1. When things got tough (and happy marriages get tough, too), she stepped aside
2. She's back in that relationship.

That is, if after betrayal, a person chose his or her partner in the same way, this will be a significant step for continuing the relationship. Because if it was a really unhappy relationship, you could stay with a new, different person. But the choice was made in the other direction. And therefore, you can try to work on restoring trust. In the same way, a person who has been betrayed also makes a choice - to stay in this relationship.

Survive the experience of betrayal
People don't always live through this gap, giving it the amount of time it really needs. Many are in a hurry to continue a relationship in which one of the partners has returned, hiding their distrust and pain. Sometimes it can even last for decades and can rob people of the opportunity to renew a true emotional connection and intimacy.

What in a relationship can lead to betrayal
For example, we do not touch each other with our hands. Are we not interested in each other as people, apart from parental duties.
It is very important to maintain romantic love despite the mortgage, bookkeeping, dog walking and picking up the kids from school. It is important to protect yourself as a couple - leave the children and go on dates. It requires effort, because there is a routine, and it is very difficult to intervene and change it. But a good relationship is about overcoming inertia.

Rebuilding trust can be long and difficult. Many triggers will be concentrated here: phones, suspicions, control. In order for this wound to heal, both partners need to be frank, if necessary, show the phone. If there is a constant reminder in a relationship that this happened to me, it means that trust is not being rebuilt. It is not something that man can control.

If I am sexually attracted to another person, it does not mean that I do not love my partner. But there is always a question of choosing whether I will develop this drive into something further.

Cheating is one of the most devastating events in a relationship.
It is difficult to survive, both emotionally and physically.
Breaking up is a traditional way out of a situation, but it's not the only way out.

Ms. Intrigue 🔥