My fleeting moment in love was not with the mother of my children! I was young then, looking for my meaning still. We were a partnership and friends! We had respect and consideration for one another. We did everything together and went everywhere together. It looked like love and sometimes it even felt like love, but in the end, 10 years later, it was a messy split with 2 children at hand,,,,! It was an honest effort with good intentions! You know they say,,, "the road to hell is paved with good intentions!!"
Lost, hurt feelings, angry, scard, insecure, just generally broken into sleepless nights and tears!! I'm so glad I'm older now!!!!!
Those struggles were unwelcome and unwanted but in the end, I learned from every little aspect of those struggles about myself. I worked hard trying to figure out how to never go through that emotional chaos ever again!!
Divorce and a custody battle of my 2 children went back and forth for 3 years, and finally it was over. (breathes) wheew,,,,, That was a mouthful!!!
Raising two children alone as a single Dad, and I still had never truly been in love!!! Oh,,,,,, but I was so smart!!! I could tell you how the cow ate the cabbage!!!!!!!
True love takes a back seat to raising my children as my focus was protecting and providing for my family!! Working a job, paying bills, and putting food on the table became my priority! I was commited, very happy and proud to do everything in my power to support my babies!!!
In the next 15 years I go through the insane process of raising two kids! All the joys and all the pitfalls,,,, I mean all of them!!!! I learn to pick my battles wisely!! I learn that even if feelings are not correct, they are still very real and need to be treated as real feelings. I learned to agree to disagree face to face and remain friends!!!!! Respect , consideration , and fair play!!!!! Through everything,,, Most of all,,,,, I learned unconditional love for my children and it kept getting stronger!!!!!
They grow up and moved out as adults and leave me high and dry with an "empty nest"!!!
There again,,, lost, scared, unfocused, but this time not angry!! Happy for them!!!
I have a completely different tool box now with a few years under my belt to boot!!!
Then I did it,,,,, I actually fell in love with my whole heart!!!! I then learned love between two is a timing issue and if the timing isn't there,,, it's not going to last. Three years later that was gone and I was devastated. I was not angry because I was in love, but I was so sad and lonely!!
It was my fleeting moment,,,, proof of love!!!!
So, it's better to have lived and have loved, than to have never loved at all..
I've done right by my family, and I know I can truly love in this life. I'm not perfect, but I'm a good man who cares about the real meanings.
Ive learned you never stop learning. :)
Thanks for letting me share with you!!!