So what to do after a quarrel? How to make peace?
After a quarrel, people usually have several ways of feeling:
1. “HE IS GUILTY, HE HURT ME”
2. “I’M GUILTY, I OFFENSED HIM”
3. “WE ARE BOTH TO GUILTY”
4. “WHAT IS HAPPENING TO US?”
We all know that to change the world you need to start with yourself. It's really true.
“I AM CHANGING AND MY LOVED ONES CHANGE ALSO WITH ME.” When we have a relationship, willy-nilly we influence each other. Likewise, changes in each occur under the influence of each other.
Whatever position you take in a quarrel or after a quarrel, it is necessary to remove this destructive energy and come to reconciliation.
THE PATH TO RECONCILIATION. HOW TO DO IT:
1. Quite often, one of the partners does not reconcile because he is overcome by the FEAR OF REJECTION. He thinks: “I’ll come up to her, start making peace, and she’ll refuse me.”
What to do in such a situation?
TIP: PLAY YOUR FEAR OF REJECTION.
Imagine that your partner, with whom you are in a quarrel, really refused to reconcile you. Construct this situation for yourself and prepare an answer to the following question, which will help you feel more confident: “WHAT WILL I DO IF MY PARTNER REFUSES ME TO RECONCILIATE?” And be prepared for an unexpected answer and the unknown. But the answer to the above question will help you move forward.You will already know what to do and what to say. This will relieve tension and eliminate fear. And it is quite possible that you will leave your partner alone in a situation of refusal and let him live with your words for a while.
2. TAKE THE OPPORTUNITY TO SPEAK THROUGH WRITING.
Quite often, this helps to remove negativity after a quarrel and convey the right words to your partner without emotion. This method is good when it is difficult for a person to say to his face what he can write on paper. Write down everything you might say on a piece of paper and give it to your partner with whom you are arguing.
3. CALL.
If you are afraid to look your partner in the eye and talk about your feelings, then if you want to make peace, this can be done over the phone. Just be sure to prepare your speech and, most importantly, be prepared for any outcome.
4. MEETING FOR RECONCILIATION.
Another way to make peace is to schedule a reconciliation meeting. Also prepare your speech and practice so that you are confident that you are delivering the right words.
How to prepare a speech.
ADVICE:
- Start your speech by saying that you understand how your partner with whom you are in a quarrel feels, that you understand what is happening to him.
- Then, tell me about your feelings. Tell me how you feel and how you feel about all this.
- After voicing your feelings and the feelings of your partner with whom you are in a quarrel, come to a consensus together and make your proposals on what to do next, how you can fix everything together so that both of you are satisfied with it.
In any case, in a quarrel, do not forget.
APOLOGIZE. THIS BRINGS PEOPLE INCREDIBLY CLOSER AND DISPERSES DESTRUCTIVE ENERGY.