Step 1. Ask yourself the question: “Why am I still single?”
We have all heard the famous saying of Mahatma Gandhi: “If you want to change the world, start with yourself.” This also applies to adjusting the situation in your personal life. It should be remembered that finding a chosen one and building a family is not a blind chance, but constant work: first on yourself, then on the relationship in a couple. If you are ready for this, then let's try to understand the reasons why your personal life may not work out.
First, think about why you want to get married. Write down all the answers that come to your mind. Try to avoid stereotypes and other people’s opinions: “because I need to get married before I’m n years old,” “because my relatives say it’s time.” Such reasons are not an indicator of readiness for a serious relationship, but of a desire to meet social expectations and dependence on the opinions of others.
Step 2. Love yourself
The next point is working with complexes. Look at the column where you described your own shortcomings that prevent you from getting married. Assess what you are willing to change about yourself. For example, courses will help correct a lack of cooking skills. Problems in communication are solved by psychological trainings and seminars. The figure can be corrected by diet and sports training. By the way, it is appearance that most often becomes the cause of women’s complexes and the resulting problems with their personal lives.
Step 3.Decide on the criteria for the chosen one
Let's move on to the problems with finding a partner. To begin with, try to formulate how you would like to see your chosen one. Here it is not necessary to indicate the desired eye color and height in centimeters; it is important to understand what type of men you are attracted to and without what qualities of a partner it is impossible for you to build a long-term relationship. Try to roughly describe your ideal:
character traits;
interests;
external data: type, physique, etc.;
age;
material wealth;
skills;
other features.
From the resulting list, select the most important qualities - no more than five. Be realistic. There aren't many princes in the world and, frankly, do you really need a prince? Maybe it is more important that your partner has similar hobbies, genuinely cares about you and loves children?
By identifying the traits of your lover, you will save a lot of effort and time: after all, this will ultimately determine how quickly and how successfully you will be able to get married.
Step 4: Take your time
So, you've followed all the recommendations and met your potential spouse. At this stage, there is no need to rush things, first of all, there is no need to tell him about your plans or hint at the imminent development of the relationship. Even with deep mutual sympathy, the chosen one will be afraid of losing freedom. Try to show that you are interested in him as a person, that you are trying to get to know him better. “Alarm bells” that a man will see when meeting all your friends and relatives are also better to exclude during the first time of communication.
Step 5.Listen to your heart
Your relationship is developing successfully, you notice that your feelings are intensifying, your loved one is becoming an increasingly close person. Perhaps you yourself still have slight doubts about your readiness for marriage. But then relatives and friends appear and begin to ask the question: “When will you get married?” - or even worse - to say: “If he still hasn’t married you, it means he’s not going to.”
Try not to pay attention to it, listen to yourself, intuition, heart. Everyone needs different amounts of time to mature. Some go to the registry office in a month, while others simply live together for years. The main thing is to follow the recommendations of the previous step and do not become a “wife” for your chosen one ahead of time.
Decide internally whether you want to live with this person for many years. If the answer is yes, then you can move on to the next point.