1. Choose someone with whom you can be connected in some way.
It goes without saying that there should be an emotional connection between you and your potential partner, but marrying someone who shares your interests is important too. For example, pursuing a hobby together is not only more fun than doing it alone, but it also bonds you.
This will result in much less fighting for control over your partner. Let's look at a couple who enjoys golfing or skiing together and compare it to those who complain that their partner's hobbies take up too much time or money. It is also important to share similar goals and values with each other. Many people get divorced after a long marriage because they do not agree with their plans for the future. Sometimes this conflict is discovered only after the children have already grown up and left home, since their upbringing was the only common goal of the parents.
2.Assess your potential spouse's relationship history.
We would all like to start over. But a separate biography can reveal certain patterns that will cause the destruction of a marriage. Pay particular attention to the extent to which the person has demonstrated the ability to maintain a long-term relationship.Also, determine what issues were problematic in his previous unions.
3. Find someone who is easy to talk to, someone who will allow you to speak your mind, especially on a troubling topic.
The truth is that many people can talk about good things, but there are even more who cannot cope with conflict. They can reflexively go on the offensive to control the process and turn it in their favor. Couples often report communication problems. However, I tend to believe that many people communicate perfectly well with each other, they just don’t like what they hear. Therefore, it is important to make sure that you can get along with the person you are planning to marry.
4.Choose someone who is willing and able to take responsibility for problems in the relationship.
Some people are too anxious or vulnerable to admit their guilt. Others are stubborn. It is important to choose someone who will be on your team, who will play with you and not against you, in order to resolve problems in the relationship. The big reward is finding someone who will apologize when needed. You will be surprised how difficult it is for many people to say “sorry” for the pain they may have caused.
5.Choose a partner whose family you respect and admire, or at least like.
It would also help if they were completely healthy. I know this may not be a big deal, but trust me, life will be much better and your relationship will be much stronger if you can get close to your significant other's family and vice versa. This will be especially important if he or she gets along with his or her family despite the difficulties.It would be foolish to think that you can just snap your partner out of whatever craziness they've been through in their life.
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