At first glance, it’s impossible to know how your relationship with this person will develop. So, the emotions you feel in that initial moment aren’t truly love. They’re more of a reflex, and here’s why: projection is at play. When we meet someone new, they can trigger deep, subconscious associations. We project onto them feelings and qualities they don’t necessarily possess. 🙄

In essence, we project our inner state onto this person—or perhaps memories of someone familiar from our past onto a complete stranger. Almost everyone has an internalized image tied to feelings of care, protection, and warmth. This image, usually rooted in childhood, is often linked to a close relative. When this image is overlaid onto a stranger, it creates the illusion of love at first sight. Suddenly, this unfamiliar person feels close, familiar, and comforting. 💕

Think about how a projector works: it casts a beam of light onto a blank screen, displaying an image. But that image isn’t the actual object—it’s just a representation. Love at first sight works the same way. We take the desired image and mistake it for reality, driven by the urge to “animate” that image—to see it come to life in someone who seems to embody security and warmth. 😇

This kind of love lasts only as long as the mind sustains the imagined version of the person. In reality, you’re in a relationship with a fictional character rather than the real individual. Eventually, a new phase begins: your partner’s true qualities come to light, and the difficult process of adjustment starts. If the person meets your expectations, genuine love may begin to grow. ❤️

But there’s also the possibility of disappointment, especially if you were convinced your partner had qualities you projected onto them. The outcome depends on how willing you are to get to know the real person and how well they align with your vision of a potential partner. 😘

More often than not, love at first sight can be problematic. The person in love clings to the projection, refusing to see the real individual behind it. This can lead to persistent frustration: “Why aren’t you the way I imagined? You *should* be this way!” A sense of betrayal may arise. 🤔

If you find yourself in such a situation and can’t find a way out, consider seeking help from a therapist—or try to work through it yourself. Ask yourself: What image are you projecting onto this person? What significant traits do you want them to have? When did this image first form? Who is its prototype? Finally, what needs are you trying to fulfill through this relationship? 🥰

To avoid getting lost in emotions and memories, keep a journal. Write down your thoughts. Find the courage to admit that the stranger in front of you can’t be a mirror of your desires. Even if they resemble someone important to you, they are still their own person. Don’t rush to reject them, though. Take the time to get to know their true self. Allow their other positive qualities to shine. 💖