🏃‍♀️ “If I Run Away… It’ll Disappear”: The Hidden Reasons We Avoid

Our brain sees problems as threats. And when threatened, it often wants to flee.
But under the surface, avoidance is usually fueled by something deeper:

1. Fear of Failing
We’re afraid of being judged, rejected, or losing control.
Like the woman who delays job hunting because she’s haunted by:
“What if I’m not good enough?” Fear of mistakes can freeze us — while doing nothing feels safer.

2. Avoiding Emotional Pain
Tough moments bring tough feelings: anger, shame, grief.
Someone who “forgets” their overdue bills might be avoiding the painful feeling of helplessness.

3. The Illusion of Comfort
Avoiding often brings short-term relief. No decisions, no risk, no change. A man who won’t open letters from the bank tells himself:
“If I don’t look at it, it’s not real.”

⚠️ The Cost of Running Away

Avoidance might feel safe at first, but over time it creates bigger problems:

• Problems Grow
Unspoken resentment turns into distrust.
A small debt becomes overwhelming.
A mild cough becomes a chronic illness.
Like a couple who avoid talking about their dissatisfaction — until one partner leaves with no explanation.

• Guilt Builds
The longer we avoid something, the more we blame ourselves:
“It’s my fault it got this bad.”
Shame fuels even more avoidance.

• It Drains You
Suppressing anxiety, faking calm, lying to yourself — it’s exhausting.
Imagine a mother who hides financial struggles from her family, lying awake each night overwhelmed by debt.
That’s not peace. That’s pressure.

🛠 How to Start Acting — Even If You’re Scared

Don’t aim for heroism. Start *small and kind*.

1. Acknowledge the Avoidance Without Shame
Tell yourself: “Yes, I’m afraid. That’s okay.” Beating yourself up only adds pressure.

2. Break It Down Into Micro-Steps
Instead of “Fix things with my friend,” try:
— Write a draft: “I’d like to talk.”
— Send: “Can we meet up?”
— Share *one* feeling, not everything at once.

3. Use the 5-Minute Rule
Promise yourself just 5 minutes a day to face the issue.
Often, that’s all it takes to start.

4. Build External Support
Add structure and support:
📅 A clear deadline: “I’ll submit the form by Friday.”
👂 A check-in buddy: “Ask me how the talk went with my boss.”
🎁 A reward: “After calling the client, I’ll get that mint chocolate chip ice cream.”

🆘 When Avoidance Becomes a Warning Sign

It might be time to reach out for help if:
— Procrastination is hurting your work, health, or relationships
— Fear leads to panic, nausea, or physical symptoms
— You cope with distractions like alcohol, shopping, or gaming

🌤 A Gentle Reminder

Avoidance is your mind trying to protect you from overload. But real self-care? That’s looking fear in the eye — with courage and compassion. You don’t have to tear down the whole wall today. Just remove one brick. Let a little light in. Even small steps do more than big avoidance ever will. ✨