🎯 1. Understanding the Reason

Start with an honest question to yourself: why do I want a divorce? Is it an emotional outburst after a fight or a long-standing feeling of distance, loneliness, and misunderstanding?

It’s helpful to ask a counter-question: if something changed — would I want to stay?
If the answer is “yes,” it might be worth considering therapy or working with a counselor together.

⚖️ 2. Emotions vs. Reality

In times of crisis, emotions often cloud judgment. Anger, resentment, fear — they’re bad advisors.
Give yourself time. Decisions made in a calm state are usually more accurate and wise. That’s not weakness — it’s maturity 💬

💬 3. Have You Tried Everything?

Sometimes divorce happens not because “everything is bad,” but because there were no attempts to figure things out.

Was there an honest conversation? Have you seen a family therapist? Have you tried to speak openly about the pain and your needs?

Knowing you did everything possible can help you avoid regret or self-blame later.

🔮 4. What Comes After?

Divorce is not only an ending — it’s also the beginning of a new life.
Picture yourself six months or a year from now: where are you living, how do you feel, how are you coping?
Is there financial stability, support, how are things with the kids (if you have them)?
A realistic view of the future is your preparation and protection tool.

👨‍👩‍👧 5. Children

If you have children, their well-being matters. But that does not mean staying in a destructive relationship “for their sake.”
Children sense tension, fear, and resentment between parents.
What matters isn’t the fact of the divorce, but *how* it happens — with respect, care, and without manipulation.

💼 6. Financial and Legal Aspects

Evaluate in advance how divorce will affect your financial situation.
It’s recommended to consult a lawyer: property division, alimony, custody, expenses.
The more clarity — the less fear and chaos.

🫶 7. Support

Divorce often comes with loneliness. Think about who can be there for you:
friends, family, a therapist, support groups.
You don’t have to go through everything alone 🤝

🌱 8. Readiness for Change

If what’s holding you is only fear of change, ask yourself honestly:

is it love and attachment — or just fear of a new life?
Sometimes, the hardships after divorce are the start of something truly good ✨

📘 Divorce Isn’t Just an Ending — It’s a Transition

It’s a step away from an old script and into a new chapter.
It takes maturity, awareness, and courage.
But if you’re honest with yourself and know you did everything you could — it can be a step toward freedom, wholeness, and inner peace 💫

✅ Checklist: When Divorce Might Be a Reasonable Step

Emotional State

🔸 Constant feelings of anxiety, depression, or emptiness
🔸 Lack of respect for your emotions, constant dismissal
🔸 Emotional or physical unsafety

Communication and Conflict

🔸 Every conversation ends in fights, yelling, or stonewalling
🔸 Partner refuses to discuss problems
🔸 Feeling unheard and ignored

Distance and Loss of Intimacy

🔸 Emotional and physical coldness
🔸 No attraction to your partner — neither physically nor emotionally
🔸 Life feels like “side by side,” but not “together”

Toxic Behavior

🔸 Manipulation, control, humiliation
🔸 Physical or psychological abuse (including gaslighting)
🔸 Lies, betrayal, infidelity

Incompatibility and Different Goals

🔸 Different views on family, finances, the future
🔸 Feeling like you're not living your own life
🔸 Disrespect for your boundaries and dreams

Lack of Will to Keep the Relationship

🔸 You no longer want to “fight”
🔸 The thought of life without your partner brings relief, not fear
🔸 Many attempts to fix things, but nothing has changed

If you see yourself in several of these points — that’s an important signal.

Maybe what’s keeping you isn’t love, but fear, guilt, or habit.
And in that case, being honest with yourself might be the start of something truly alive and real 💛