Self-love is not words on pictures on social networks. It is not “I need to go to a spa” if you do not have the strength to get off the couch. Being in harmony with yourself means getting to know yourself anew every day, even if you feel weak.

I realized this when I got up at five in the morning one day, just to see the sky change. Without music, without coffee, even without a phone. I sat on a cold bench, my jacket inside out, and… for the first time in my life I felt silence inside. This was the beginning. I thought I was tired, but in reality it turned out I was running away from this.

Since then, I gave myself a couple of rules - do not mock myself with words. If I'm tired, I say, "Too bad, but not today." If I want to dance for no reason, I go dance. Yesterday, for example, I took a bath with rose petals and two drops of essential oil — just because I was told it was "right." I was there alone, listening to the sound of the water drowning out my thoughts, and for the first time in a long spring, I realized: it's not my fault that I want a little beauty.

Loving yourself is not only pleasant, it's sometimes difficult. I cry if I want to. I allow myself to be sad, to shudder. But I never tell myself, "You're bad." Instead, I ask, "What do you need now? Silence? Communication? Honey? An evening covered with a blanket?"

On Sunday morning, I cooked myself a real omelet with goat cheese, tomatoes, and basil. Not minimal — I like food to make me happy. And after the first bite, I remembered how I love the world when it's simple. No need for philosophy. You need to try.

And self-love has long been the fact that sometimes I turn off notifications for a day and read a book that I bought six months ago, when I thought “because I have to.” And now I read because I want to.

I am learning to accept that not everything has to be productive. Sometimes silence is the answer. Sometimes meditative breathing is more important than all the trainings. And most often I remind myself: “You are already good. You are already needed.”

And when I tell myself this, I am not ashamed to smile. Because I love myself the way I love the best sunset: unconditionally.