A look from the outside: sober calculation against “chemistry”

Friends have one undeniable advantage - they are not under the influence of a hormonal cocktail that turns off critical thinking at the beginning of a relationship. Where you see “mysterious silence,” a friend may notice coldness and lack of interest. Where you justify not being obligated with a “busy schedule,” your friend will see a classic sign of disrespect for other people’s time. Those around us often read “red flags” much earlier than we do, simply because their vision is not clouded by love.

However, listening to all the advice in a row is a dangerous strategy. It is important to understand from which point your loved one is speaking. Friends are also people with their own baggage of failures, fears and stereotypes.

- Anyone who has experienced a serious betrayal will see a potential traitor in every new acquaintance of yours.

- Someone who values ​​only material status will devalue your chosen one for not having an expensive car.

Often, advice from friends is not an analysis of your situation, but a broadcast of their own negative experience. At such moments, they do not protect you, but their ideas about what is “right.”

To prevent outside opinions from ruining a potentially happy union, it is worth introducing a simple check. If friends point out specific facts of behavior (rudeness, lying, ignoring your requests), it’s worth taking a closer look at. These are objective signals. If the criticism concerns tastes, appearance or lifestyle that suits you personally, this is a matter of taste.

Remember that you are the one to build the relationship, not your company. In March, when everything around is being renewed, it is important to learn to trust your inner tuning fork. Friends can be great guides when choosing a vacation hotel or a new smartphone, but when it comes to intimacy, you should always have the final say. In the end, it is you who falls asleep and wakes up with this person