I was walking through the market last week when I tripped over a loose tile😅. I stumbled, caught myself, and felt my whole face turn red. I looked around to see who had noticed. To my surprise, only about two people were looking. Everyone else was just going about their day.

That is when I remembered something I had read about called the Spotlight Effect. It is a psychological phenomenon where people overestimate how much others notice them. We walk around thinking everyone is watching us, judging us, paying attention to our every move. But the truth is, most people are too busy worrying about themselves to notice us. Here's a way to bring you back to reality: you could be worried about an embarrassing shirt you wore or so, but sit and think whether you remember anyone's 'embarrassing' shirt.

I think about this a lot in the context of dating and relationships. How many times have I held back from saying something because I was afraid of looking foolish? How many times have I overthought a message because I was worried about how it would be received? How many times have I stayed quiet because I was convinced everyone was watching?

The Spotlight Effect is a lie we tell ourselves. It keeps us small. It keeps us safe. It also keeps us from taking risks.

I am not saying I will never feel embarrassed again. I definitely will haha. But I am trying to remember that most people are not paying as much attention to me as I think they are because they're probably focused on themselves too. And that is actually freeing💋

Olga🌸