The advice has been passed down for generations. Don't text back too fast. Act busy. Make them chase you. Keep them guessing. Here's the problem. Sometimes it works. And sometimes it costs you the person you actually wanted.

✅When it works
It works on people who thrive on uncertainty. People who mistake anxiety for attraction. People who only want what feels slightly out of reach. For them, the chase is the point. And if you make it too easy, they lose interest.

❌When it backfires
It backfires on secure people. People who know what they want and don't have time for games. People who take your distance at face value and simply move on. People who assume that if you wanted them, you would show it.

Frankly speaking, while you're playing hard to get, someone else is playing easy to talk to. Someone else is replying with warmth instead of strategy. Someone else is being present instead of performative🥺. And the person you were trying to catch probably noticed.

The real cost🙊💰
Playing hard to get can work short term. It creates tension. It creates intrigue. But it also creates a relationship built on performance. You set the precedent that love is something to be won through effort, not something to be shared openly. And now you have to keep playing. Forever. That gets exhausting. For both of you😁.

🦶🏻What to do instead
Be warm. Be interested. Be available. Not desperate, not clingy, just honest. If you like someone, show it. If you're busy, say so. If you need space, take it and explain why.

The right person will not lose interest because you were kind to them. The right person will not run because you replied within an hour. The right person will not punish you for being clear about what you want.

Olga🤭