Love: such a strange, twisted emotion, so full of passion that the moment it subdues, we begin to wonder if it exists. The heights are so great, that when in the throes of receptive love, we feel we can conquer the world, and when it ebbs, there is only despair; the feeling that all is lost, and we can never recover what once was ours.



What do we do when we feel that magic moment slipping away from us, when the vessel we had been pouring our deepest emotions into seems to be running dry? We could turn away, bury ourselves in our work, in our play, in our denial, while a small quivering part still cries, “I still love you”.



Divorce plays heavily in the modern world that seeks to keep alive those thrills and joys of initial passion. In fact, the divorce rate is so high, that many are of the opinion that love doesn’t exist at all; it’s only a momentary attraction. Yet, there are still couples whose marriages or unions have lasted well beyond the initial infatuation phase and have stuck together through all obstacles; poverty, illness, conflicts, tragedy, to the point where one wonders, “how do they do it?” Actually, much of this steadfast love is heavily reliant on rituals.



1. Always say “I Love You”

The leading advice among those experienced in long term commitments is to always say, “I love you”. At the end of the day, even if you’ve been quarreling, do not end your night without those three little words of endearment. Keep a morning ritual of reminding your loved one of your feelings. An “I love you,” before your partner goes out the door, a reminder note on the refrigerator, a hand-drawn heart next to the coffee cup keeps that fire kindling long after the first flame was lit.



2. It’s in the Food

There is an old saying, “the quickest way to a man’s heart is through his stomach”. This actually applies to both sexes as the anticipation of a good meal is a driving force for any communal bond, and there are as many men who enjoy cooking as there are women. In our hurry-up world, many couples depend on a once a week dinner at a good restaurant for spending some pleasurable time together. For the stay at home cook, however, there are a few secrets that make the cooking experience a ritual that can bind the heart forever. Oysters and onions are both mild aphrodisiacs, but ginger not only is a subtle ingredient for romantic bonding, it can also be addicting. Add a pinch of ginger to your romantic meals and you not only will keep your love life healthy, your lover will stay healthy, too.



3. The Fragrant Body

Fragrances set the tone for any romantic encounter, and once your appearance becomes associated with a particular scent, your fragrance becomes unforgettable. This does not mean you need to go out and buy an expensive perfume, dousing yourself down before each encounter. A bath ritual is highly effective, and allows the scents to seep deeply into your pores. A relaxing bath among lavender, comfrey, rose petals, a few drops of musk oil and cinnamon will excite your companion, while you remain calm and mysterious. Place potpourri among the clothing in your dresser drawers so your mystery scent never goes away, and the one thing he’ll remember best is how sweet you always smell.



4. Make it Candlelight

Candles are immediately associated with romance, and for good reason. Their limited glow causes the objects of everyday life to fade into the background, allowing the imagination to make its own images in the blank spaces where the darkness starts. It leaves the focus on only you and your partner, softening lines, adding a warm glow to the features and skin. Candlelight encourages meditation and opens the mind toward relaxing conversation. Make candles a part of your rituals, and the flame will never be extinguished.



5. Body Language Says it All

Body language is a fine art when practiced from a conscious perception. Use your eyes to talk for you, the sidelong glance, or gazing deeply into your loved one’s eyes, a smile barely playing around your lips. Keep your hands expressive, yet elegantly controlled, and learn to walk lightly, placing just enough emphasis on hip movement to be erotic, but not overly suggestive. Breathe in deeply before speaking, pitching your voice lower than your normal tone and your body will be speaking pure sensuality, a message very difficult for your loved one to ignore.



6. That’s our Music

There is nothing quite like that first time you listened to a song with a date, realizing it was not only a song you both enjoyed, but that you were falling in love. That song can be one of the most memorable moments of your lives. Keep a cassette of that song, and things are looking a little shaky, haul out the candles and aromatic scents and play that music that brought you together for the first time.



7. Pairing Things Up

You might be thinking, I don’t have a significant other right now. I want a ritual that will bring one to me. What you need is to start thinking in pairs. Buy two matching end tables for your furniture, two paintings that match and complement each other, two matching lamps setting across from each other. Instead of one tall candlestick, buy two. Soon you will be thinking in pairs, enticing a lover to come to you.



8. The Dating Game

In Europe, it’s very common for people to go on group dates. Paired couples will invite along a couple of single friends in the hopes that the two will enjoy each other’s company. This relieves a lot of pressure from the traditional American blind date, where a couple is matched by friends, family or a dating service and expected to somehow stumble through the strangeness and make a go of it. Within a group, you don’t feel the awkwardness of being with someone you don’t know, or the pressure of trying to be entertaining. If you find you enjoy the company of each other, a few more group dates or private dates will tell you all you need to know, and if the spark just wasn’t there, that’s fine too. At least you went out and had a good time.



9. Visualization

Are you sure you’re opening yourself up to a relationship? You’ve arranged your home with pairs, you’ve joined the dating game, and still things just aren’t clicking. Maybe it’s because you haven’t visualized yourself in love. Spend some time in your candle lit room, with music going softly in the background. Close your eyes and visualize your lover coming to your receptive arms. After a while, this ritual will reflect in your mannerisms, letting prospective partners know you’re ready for love.



10. Treat Yourself

Choose a place you enjoying going; a coffee shop, a park, a gallery or museum, and go there once a week or more, always around the same time. Dress like you were planning to meet someone, but allow yourself simply to enjoy your surroundings. After awhile, the spot will be like another home to you and you’ll get to know others who visit the location frequently. If you are relaxed and receptive, that just may be the place where the love of your life is waiting.

Don't ignore me please if you are seriouse in your search too ! i'm waiting for you , my love !

Julia