Hello) Endless articles and trainings that advise everywhere, and even categorically demand: “love yourself!”, If they inspire, then only for a short time. Because soon you will be convinced: the experience of a full-bosomed blonde who did not love herself because her mother did not spend enough time in her childhood, and then tensed up and admitted that she was beautiful, did not suit you. And the story of a wonderful photographer who took amazing photographs, but could not take as much for his work as it really cost, because of low self-esteem, and then he looked at himself differently and became rich - he was not talking about you either. And all these “love yourself” will not work for you. Because their problems are far-fetched, and yours are real. You have neither a super appearance that you do not appreciate due to incorrect attitudes, nor talents that you ignore. Everything is bad and everything is real: short legs, full hips, poor skin and so-so work, which they seem to pay for, but that's all: no joy, no prospects. And so you have a sad face, and with such as all these positive gurus and trainers of femininity assure, they will not marry. That's all, the circle is closed. “Love yourself!” - how so. With such data? You might think that by auto-training in front of a mirror you can fix protruding ears. And even if you suggest to yourself that it is irresistible with your twenty extra kilograms - will others cease to notice them too? Or are you just going to turn into a city madman, over whom everyone is giggling behind him? No, all these nonsense are “love yourself”, love - it is either there or not. If you have made such conclusions, then you are right. But only half. The error lies in the sign: plus or minus. Yes, love is there or not. But you have it. In fact, you already love yourself. You just do it so ineptly that you cannot even recognize it yourself. So inexperienced parents love the child: they shout at him so that he does not fall, scold him so that he does not repeat it anymore, criticize him so that he strives for the best, and punish him to draw conclusions. Do they wish him well? Probably yes. Does the child feel it? Unlikely. If you were indifferent to yourself, you would not care if the food is delicious or not, you are cold or hot, comfortable or not. You would not choose beautiful places to relax and nice people to chat with. And I would not read this article now. Well, since you are not indifferent, then you have some kind of warm feelings for yourself. This means that you do not “love” not yourself, but what you have. And this is a completely different story. You can’t do anything with yourself: you simply are, such as you are, neither good nor bad, nor kind, nor evil, nor smart, nor stupid - just you. But with what you possess (kindness or bitterness, intelligence or stupidity, character and actions), you can do anything: change, fix, get rid, refine, improve. But first you need to understand if you really need it. Do you want it and does it bother you? If you try to realize not your own, but other people's desires, nothing will work out: the psyche will resist and sabotage the process. Bye bye!