I have come to the conclusion that none of us really have any idea who the people in the profiles we read, actually are. We look at the pictures, we read the words they have written and we then gravitate towards those we feel most connected to (or simply are attracted to the most). But I think we all - in our mind - create a whole world of scenarios and possibilities of what this person could be like. We imagine them to have all the qualities we dream about. But I do think we manipulate ourselves in our thinking; we ‘project’ our desires onto these people, making them ‘ideal’ for us, when in truth we just don’t know. I am no different. I often sit and look at the beautiful women and I day-dream about what it COULD be like, if we were together. And in my mind’s eye, we are wonderful, a perfection of harmony, support, affection and sexuality. But, I’m sure you will understand what I mean when I say this; it does not mean this is how it will ACTUALLY be. But we WANT it to be like this, so we imagine ourselves in this kind of relationship. I am far from perfect. I am just me. You read what I have written about myself, and maybe you get a clue about who I am... but it’s like reading the first page of a book and declaring you know how it will end. I think you will agree, this is almost impossible to do! And I think the same could be said when reading someone’s profile – you get a small glimpse of who the person is and then your imagination takes over... and suddenly you’re seeing wedding dresses and a ‘Happy Ever After...’ – I wish it could be like this...

So... what can we do once we have found someone we really like? Well, we can exchange letters and explore each other’s soul; this is a very good way to find out how the persons mind works. But even then, we can only hope that the words we read have been written with sincerity, and that it is a complete truth (they say what they ACTUALLY believe). Something simple like ‘I don’t like it when it rains’ can be taken at face value, you wouldn’t doubt that it is a sincere statement because why would anyone lie about something so banal? But other things get much more complicated. The problem is, in my experience, people tend to say what they think the other person wants to hear - as opposed to what they really feel.

A very simple example would be this: I ask what you are like in bed, you reply ‘I’m a wild cat!’ – But in your heart, you know this isn’t true. Maybe you WANT to be a wild cat, and maybe u think this person will let you actually BECOME a wild cat – but you don’t know for sure. But you tell them you are because you don’t want them to lose interest. You think this is what they want to hear. Do you understand what I am trying to say? I guess what I’m trying to tell you is being yourself, being honest about who you are, this is what's important.

Just be yourself...

You shouldn't feel like you have to impress someone. If we honor each other with the truth then we get a much clearer understanding of who the other is. When you have a real understanding of someone, you then have a much better foundation to build a relationship upon – which will allow you to make something very special happen between you. Basically, and using the same example, if you are not a wild cat, this isn’t a bad thing! If you WANT TO BE a wild cat, then just tell the person, and you can explore this side of your nature together. Doing things this way will make you so much closer to each other, and as a result, a REAL trust is then allowed to grow between you. Once you have a sound foundation, and an absolute trust in each other... then a miracle is born; True Love.

I hope what I have said is making sense to you, and you don’t think I’m crazy :)

I hope you all find the perfect person for YOU... but don't trade away your principles, dignity or the standards you wish to maintain in your future relationship. I truly hate this saying 'Keep it real' - but my advise is to follow it. You will only strengthen the possibility of finding someone who will genuinely match you and what you desire.

Anyway, that's my 2 cents... Peace all!